Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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