i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
