I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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