We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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