so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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