So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Randomize