the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
