Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
