No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
