ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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