what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
