All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
