You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
