eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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