The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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