Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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