whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize