i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
