No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
