We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
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