He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
