Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize
