yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
