i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
