This is not my ceiling
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
