susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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