I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I think i peed on brittanys purse
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
