It's like a parade of train wrecks.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
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