I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
