please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize