Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize
