no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
