Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
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