I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
