Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
