All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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