Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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