So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Less talking, more tequila
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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