I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
