so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
