i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Randomize
