margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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