Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
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