Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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