SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Randomize
