A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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