theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
