just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize