My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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