I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
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