So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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