my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
